Life Changer
by EvaLovesCastle
Summary: Richard Castle sees this amazing woman at a restaurant. On the next day they meet again, and this time he can't let her go... This is the one meeting that will change their lives forever! *Caskett AU*
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

"Alexis, honey, please try to eat the fries, so they actually stay on the plate!" said Rick as he took another bite of his food, watching how the little girl picked up some fries from the table and placed them back onto the plate.

"Sorry daddy," she mumbled and looked down, not eating her food.

"What's wrong, pumpkin?" he asked, a second later realizing it was a stupid question. He knew exactly what was wrong, but maybe talking about it would help the girl a little.

"Why isn't mommy with us?" she asked with a small voice and looked up at her father who wasn't smiling anymore, like he used to do whenever she was around.

"Mommy had to work, Lex, you know that," he tried to explain, not knowing how to tell a 6 year old that her mother had walked out on her. Sure, she promised to visit but he doubted that she'll ever keep that promise. That was just how Meredith was, work came first and that's why she had flown to LA just a week ago.

"I know, but why can't she do it here? I don't want her to be so far away. I know she didn't live with us for a while but she still spent time with me. Does she love her job more than she loves me?" the little girl asked with a worried face, so close to crying that Rick didn't have a heart to tell her the whole truth.

"No, honey, she loves you very much, but this was a really big opportunity for her and it's not like she'll be gone forever." He hated doing this to Alexis. She deserved so much more than a mother who was barely there, and who now had moved to LA, a city so far away from them.

"You know what?" he said a second later, "Why don't we finish up here, and then we can go home and have a laser tag battle before bed?"

As he had hoped, Alexis' face brightened and she started to work on her fries again. Laser tag always cheered her up. He had bought them right after his divorce with Meredith almost a year ago. Alexis had been miserable when she moved out and it had been the only way to get the little girl to smile.

He stared at his daughter, smiling and thinking how grateful he was that she was finally doing better when the restaurant's door opened and a woman stepped in.

She was tall and wearing high heels what didn't look too comfortable. Her brown hair was falling in curls over her back and she was wearing a black dress. A beautiful one, too, not too long and showing off her perfect figure. She looked around the crowd, probably looking for someone, because there was no way a woman that stunning would be spending her evening alone.

Ah, there she goes, Rick thought as the woman approached one of the tables, not far away from them. A man was waiting for her, not that it was a surprise, but she didn't look too happy about meeting him. A story started to form in his mind. The woman was a CIA agent on a mission to take down some dangerous guy, and she was meeting her contact for dinner just to get the information she needed.

Returning to his own world, Rick looked back at his daughter who was now finishing her last fry.

"All done," she said happily and then looked at her fathers plate where food remained untouched. "Why aren't you eating, daddy. Aren't you hungry?" she asked, her big blue eyes very confused.

"Right, sorry pumpkin, got lost in my thoughts. Do you want to have a dessert or should we just go home?" he asked and the girl picked up the menu again. "Dessert it is."

Just then the man, few tables away stood up really quickly and started to walk towards the door. The woman was just as fast and before he could take two steps she was on him, putting her hand on his shoulder.

"Not so fast, Mr. Anderson" he heard the woman say. The man, who was maybe 30 years old spun around and tried to aim him fist at her face. She caught it and twisted it into an awkward angle behind his back, which made the man gasp for air. At the same time she pushed him against the table and slapped the cuffs onto his wrists.

"Mr. Anderson. You're under arrest for drug possession, smuggling and murder," she told him, her voice hard. Most of the people who were dining had stopped whatever they were talking about and watched the beautiful cop holding the struggling man against the table.

This was so much better than his CIA theory. This was actually happening right before his eyes; an undercover operation. How cool is that, Rick thought and continued to observe the woman.

"Yo, Beckett, you okay?" Rick heard someone say, and then spotted a Latino guy walking towards the woman. He was wearing a causal suit, so Rick assumed that he was with the police, too.

"I'm fine, Esposito, but you may wanna get this one out of here before he ruins anyone else's evening." Beckett smiled and handed the man over to Esposito. "Have a nice life in jail," she told him and then turned back to her table.

"You're not coming?" Esposito asked, surprised. "I thought you were the one who wanted to interrogate him so badly,"

"He's all yours. I have a Friday night to enjoy!" she told him, laughing, as Rick just stared at her. She was amazing, not only beautiful but also capable of taking care of herself.

"See you on Monday, boss" said the Latino and escorted the man out the door.

The woman, or Beckett as the other cop had called her took her purse and followed him. And then she was gone, too.

"Daddy, what just happened?" Alexis asked and put down the menu.

"It was the police, they were catching a bad guy, just like in daddy's books," he told her, knowing that the answer was reassuring enough. And it had been exactly like one of his books. The ideas started flowing through his mind and he had the sudden urge to start writing. He had new inspiration, now.

"Come on, pumpkin, let's go home," he told Alexis and handed the girl her little pink coat.

"But I thought we were going to eat dessert and then go home," she answered, all confused again.

"Let's eat ice cream at home and watch a movie instead of laser tag. It's a bit late for that, and if you're worked up you'll never ever fall asleep," he told her as he wrapped a scarf around her neck.  
Taking her father's hand, the little redhead walked out of the restaurant.

* * *

Her feet were hurting, but she could probably blame it on the unpractical shoes that she had been wearing. Kate unlocked her apartment door and tossed the keys on the little table beside the door.

She was tired, not only had she been working, but she had also been clubbing with her best friend Lanie, who had convinced her to do something for her 24th birthday. The whole thing had ended with Lanie leaving with some handsome guy and Kate feeling too drunk to do anything she wouldn't regret on the morning. It was for the best to go back home, considering that she could collapse any second. She was just that tired.

Feeling like a zombie, she kicked off her heels, leaving them right there on the floor of the corridor and falling onto the couch. Her neck wouldn't be thanking her in the morning, but she didn't care. Right now she just wanted to sleep.

* * *

As he lay on the couch with his daughter fast asleep on his arm, Rick thought about the pretty cop. She'd had character, and that's what he needed. Taking his laptop from the coffee table he opened it and started a new document. For a second he hesitated, thinking that maybe the cop wouldn't appreciate that he was writing a story about her, but then he remembered that he was probably never gonna see her again so it didn't matter.

With a sigh he started writing again, something he hadn't done for almost a year.

* * *

**So this it the first chapter of my first fanfic. i've had this idea for a while to write something but i never had the time... I'm sorry that my English isn't perfect cause this isn't my first language but i hope you'll enjoy it anyway:)**

**Let me know what you think!**

**xo Eva**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

She groaned as she turned her head to one side. Every muscle in her body hurt from spending the night on the couch. It had seemed like a good idea at the time. Her head was pounding and there was a dry feeling in her mouth.

_Never again, _she told herself. She hadn't had a lot of hangovers but this was definitely one. Then again, you only turned 24 once.

Reaching out her hand, she picked up her phone from the small, wooden coffee table beside the couch, the screen too bright, making her eyes hurt.

It was a little past nine which was okay, because she didn't have to work today. She had a weekend off to celebrate her birthday. At least that was done now.

She'd had a nice dinner with her father the day before yesterday and it seemed to her, that he was doing better. He was finally sober and she had a feeling that this time she might even get her Dad back. Her Mom's absence... No, she didn't want to go there today. She wanted to get out of those dirty clothes, have a nice, long shower and then maybe go for a walk.

She almost cried out when she sat up and pulled her hair into a sloppy ponytail. Her head was definitely going to fall off if she didn't get a painkiller soon. Stiffly Kate made her way to the kitchen in her quest for painkillers. That's when she noticed the small calendar, hanging on the fridge with a green magnet. Today was circled, so it meant that there was something she was not supposed to forget. If she could only remember what it was...

Leaning against the table, she took her pills and washed them down with some water, still staring at the small calendar.

And then it hit her; it was Richard Castle's book signing. But it wouldn't start until eleven, so she had two hours to clean up and get this hangover under control. Instead of going back to bed, she headed for the shower.

* * *

Rick entered his daughter's room, quietly, not wanting to wake her just yet. He sat down beside her bed, watching as the little redhead slept peacefully, one arm wrapped around her favorite monkey. Personally Rick thought that the poor toy looked pretty damaged. But Alexis loved it, taking it everywhere with her, ever since she was two.

As the girl started to turn slightly, he got up and shook her shoulder gently.

"Time to wake up, pumpkin," he whispered and Alexis opened her sleepy eyes.

"Hi, daddy," she murmured and turned her head, so she could look at her father.

"You should get dressed, Gram's gonna be here soon," he told her, sitting on the edge of her bed.

"Why can't I just go with you daddy?" she asked, a little sad about the fact that her dad wasn't going to spend the Saturday with her. They always spent the weekends together, going out or doing some other cool projects. It was their time.

"Because daddy is going to do boring book stuff and it'll probably take a while, so you'd just get bored. Plus your Grams wants to take you out and spoil you a little and we can spend some time together when you get back," he explained, secretly wondering if it was such a good idea to let his mother watch Alexis for the afternoon. Sure, she had raised him, so she knew how to be around children, but still... "Anyway, time to get out of bed, pumpkin. Any requests for breakfast?" he asked, slowly getting up and walking to the door.

"Pancakes!" Alexis immediately told him.

"The smiley faced ones?"

"Yes, those, please," she told him happily and got out of bed.

Rick headed back down to the kitchen, getting out everything he needed to make smiley face pancakes.

* * *

Kate felt nervous and she didn't even know why. It was just a book signing. So now, standing in the long line she felt a small smile covering her face. There was absolutely nothing to be nervous about.

She tossed her brown hair over one shoulder, wishing she'd had the time to curl it properly when her phone started ringing.

Without looking at the screen she answered, "Beckett."

"_Oh my god. What happened last night?_" Lanie exclaimed.

"I don't know, you tell me," she told her and laughed softly. That was the line she was usually using on her.

"_I remember me and you clubbing, and then this nice guy asked me to dance and then... Wait, when did you leave?_"

"Right after you, and I for once went home so I could get some sleep." Kate heard Lanie groan at the other end. "Are you at his house?"

"_No, I took off right after I woke up. He was still asleep, and it was easier than doing all that 'Hey, what's your name?'-bit all over again,_" Lanie confessed and then there was a silence. "_Where are you? I can hear people talking._"

"I'm at a book store," Kate told her, not mentioning that she was there to get the latest Derek Storm novel signed.

"_Girl, you read too much. Meet you for coffee later?_"

"I could do that," Kate said as she didn't have any other plans. Of course she wanted to read the novel, but it could wait a bit, but only a bit. Still, Lanie came first.

"_Great, so I'll see you at our usual, say 3 pm?_"

"Sure, bye Lanie." Kate disconnected the call before Lanie had time to respond as the line started moving.

"Hello. And what's your name?" he asked again, probably for the 100th time in the past hour.

"I'm Andie," the red haired woman with crazy curls told him, "And let me just say, I _love_ your books, they're addictive. You just can't put it down!"

"Well, thank you Andie for coming today," he answered and gave her one of his dazzling smiles. It wasn't completely fake, but it wasn't his honest smile, either. He only used that smile when he was with Alexis. This was his publicity smile.

Playing with his pen he took the next book that was being offered to him.

"And who can I make this out to?" he asked without looking up, suddenly feeling tired.

"Kate Beckett," he heard a familiar name and quickly looked up.

And then all he could do was stare into those green eyes. He saw her wavy, brown hair and the soft smile that was playing on her lips. It was the kick ass woman from the previous night, the beautiful cop who'd arrested that guy without even using her gun. It was really her.

"Its you," he murmured before he could stop himself.

Her face immediately looked confused, "Excuse me?"

He wanted to slap himself. _Did I really say that out loud? _he thought to himself.

"I've seen you before," he told her, "Last night, you arrested a man in that restaurant. Pretty impressive." And then he smiled at her, his honest smile.

"Oh...I'm... Thank you," she said and he could see a light blush appearing. It was cute, he thought.

"Hey, I thought that maybe you'd like to have coffee with me sometime. I'd love to ask you a few questions about your job," he said, once again without thinking. Damn it, what kind of an idiot was he? She was obviously going to say 'no'.

But before she could answer, he felt a hand on his shoulder and turned around. It was Gina, his publisher.

"Rick, people aren't here to watch you making small talk. You should know that," she told him and gave him one of her patented 'If you don't stop it, I will hurt you' glare.

"Oh, yeah, sorry," he told her and quickly signed Kate's book.

"Thank you for coming," he told Kate as he handed her the book.

"Thank you," she answered, and with a small smile she was gone. Again.

As Kate made her way to the exit, she couldn't believe what had just happened. Her favorite author knew who she was, _and_ wanted to have coffee with her. She shook her head and glanced back at the table where he was signing away. Then she remembered the book that she was still holding. She opened it up and looked at the fist page, where he had written his words.

_'To Kate,_

_Smile, you have a beautiful one.'_

Under was his signature and a number.

_Wait, what?_ Then she realized what that was. It was his number. Richard Castle had given her his personal number.

Kate suddenly realized she was grinning like a crazy person, so she relaxed her facial muscles and put the book into her purse.

Who knows, maybe she'd give him a call?

* * *

**Disclaim: Don't own castle:(**

**So that's it for chapter 2:D _Please_ let me know what you think and forgive me any mistakes that i might have made!**

**xo Eva**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

Kate opened the door to the coffee shop and looked around for Lanie. She had to be here somewhere. She was hardly ever late. The ME was sitting near the large window, where you could see all the people passing by on the street. The little coffee shop was crowded for some reason, and the line was pretty long. Then she noticed the two mugs on the table before Lanie. Kate smiled and made her way to the table.

"Hey. You look awfully thoughtful." She told her, smiling, as she took off her coat and draped it over the back of her chair. Lanie snapped out of her thoughts and looked up at her.

"Oh, hey. I was just thinking about everything and how I'm an awful person and how what I did was wrong and..." before she could go any further Kate interrupted her. After all, she was here to comfort her.

"Stop it, okay? You're not a bad person. These things happen, so don't beat yourself up about it. A one night stand is no big deal, really," she told her, and continued, "I went to a book signing,"

"Ah, so that's why you were at the book store. Who's signing was it?" she asked and took a sip of her coffee.

"Richard Castle. Apparently he knew who I was," she told her, not being able to hold it inside any longer. Kate felt her smile grow again, and this time she didn't try to stop it. She was allowed to be happy about the fact that her favorite author knew who she was.

"He what?" Lanie burst out, "How's that even possible?"

"You know that work thing I had before we met up last night?" Kate started, desperately wanting to skip the boring part.

"Yeah, that undercover dinner. How did it go, by the way?" Lanie asked, leaning attentively towards her friend.

"It was great; got the bastard and now he's hopefully safely behind bars. Anyway, he was there. At the restaurant, I never saw him but obviously he saw me. So today at his signing he recognized me." Kate then paused to drink her coffee before it got cold.

"Kate, don't leave me waiting, here. What happened next?" Lanie demanded, excitedly.

Kate turned around and reached for her purse that was hanging from the chair. She dug out the copy of his book and then handed it to her friend, who looked at her with confusion.

"I know you love his book but I'm not a fan," she told her, still holding the book with just one hand. Kate rolled her eyes. She knew very well that Lanie liked his books, she just never admitted it in public.

"Just open it," Kate told her and watched as the ME turn to the first page, where his dedication was written. She was silent for a moment and then her eyes grew wide.

"Is _that_ what I _think_ it is?" she asked Kate, her mouth hanging open as she closed the book and placed it on the table.

"I'm pretty sure that's his number. He told me he'd like to have coffee with me, but I never got a chance to answer," she explained and finished her drink with one big sip.

"So, what are you going to do. Are you going to call him?"'

"I'm not sure," Kate told her, honestly, because as much as she wanted to call the writer, she was afraid to become another one of his women. _Why would I even think that?_ she thought. _It's not like he asked me on a date._

"Are you crazy, Kate Beckett. You are going to call him. He basically told you he wanted to see you again. So you are going to make that call even if I have to tie you up, and hold your own gun to your head!" Lanie stopped her rant just in time to see Kate chuckle. "What?"

"Nothing, you're just funny when you're trying to make a point. And I don't think that's necessary. I'm going to call him. Soon," she promised. She had finally made up her mind.

"Oh you better, girl" was all that Lanie said.

* * *

Rick opened his apartment door with one hand, the other one was holding a little brown bear. Hearing the door, his mother came out of the living room, looking exquisite as usual.

"Oh, Richard, darling, you don't know how much fun we've had," she told him loudly and then crouched her shoulders, as she remembered something. "Alexis passed out on the couch and I didn't have a heart to wake her. You know how cute she looks when she sleeps," she now whispered and pointed at the black leather couch that was in the middle of the living room facing the too big flat screen TV.

"It's okay. I'm just going to get changed and then maybe I'll cook something for dinner," he told her and made his way to his room.

When passing the couch, he tucked the small bear under Alexis' blanket and the little girl's fingers immediately wrapped around it. He smiled to himself. She really did look cute. He never wanted to forgive her mother for leaving her. How could she just walk out on this beautiful little girl? But slowly, Alexis was starting to heal, and he was in no way letting Meredith near her ever again.

Throwing his jacket on the bed he heard his phone ringing and his heart skipped a beat. Maybe it was Kate, the kick ass woman to whom he had given his number. Crossing his fingers, he picked up the phone and looked at the screen. There was no ID which meant there still was a chance.

"Richard Castle," he said as he picked up the phone from the dark bed cover and pressed the answer button.

"Hi, it's me, Kate," came the familiar voice from the other end and he felt his smile grow.

"Hi, Kate. I was hoping you'd call. We didn't have a chance to finish our conversation earlier," he told her. When she didn't interrupt him he continued, "I was thinking that maybe I could buy you a coffee and we could talk about your job, you know, for my books," he said, feeling uncertain how she was going to respond. He usually always knew how women were going to respond, and maybe that's why he hadn't been so lucky with his marriage.

"You know what? That sounds good," he heard her say after a small pause.

"Really?" Rick asked, a little surprised. He'd already prepared himself for a refusal. Why,he didn't know.

"Yeah, sure," she answered and he heard a smile in her voice.

"So, when then?" he asked quickly, not letting her slip away. He'd seen her go twice now and he was determined not to let it happen again.

"I have tomorrow off," she told him slowly, "Do you know that little place right down the street from the book store where you were signing, today?"

"Yeah, I'll see you there at noon?" he said, closing his eyes and praying for her to say yes.

"I'll see you there. Bye, Mr. Castle," she told him and disconnected.

"Bye, Kate," he said quietly, even tough there was no one listening.

* * *

**So i'm sorry that this one is a little short but i didn't want them to meet in this chapter. ANd i dont know when im going to post a new chapter, Should i make it a regular thing? Anyway, i have a cold right now so i have some time to write.**

**Just enjoy and leave some rewievs:)**

**Eva! xo**


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

Kate glanced nervously at her watch and then back to her bathroom mirror. She had an hour, a whole hour to get ready. She checked herself out in the mirror, and when she was satisfied with her hair and minimal make-up, she returned to her bedroom.

It wasn't a date and yet, she was nervous. It certainly had something to do with the fact that she was going to meet Richard Castle for coffee. Not wanting to overdo her appearance, she picked out a pair of dark jeans and a white cardigan which fit well with her brownish coat.

She dressed quickly and then checked her pockets for her phone, keys and wallet. She was glad that the coffee shop wasn't too far. If it started raining she could get back home quickly and without soaking herself trough.

Before leaving, Kate threw one last glance towards the mirror. Her dark hair was slightly curled, falling in waves over her shoulders. Brown coat, dark blue jeans and boots with high heels. She always wore high heels when she wanted to boost her confidence. At work people never understood how she could be a cop, wearing shoes like those. But she loved it and they gave her the extra height that she needed. She was tall for a woman, but most of the men were still taller.

She locked her apartment door and then took the stairs down, not wanting to wait for the elevator.

The weather was getting colder, not icy cold, but it sure felt like it. There was no sun which made the temperature feel even colder. She tucked her hands into her coat pockets and headed off.

_What is it going to be like, _she wondered. It had taken her an hour after her conversation with Lanie to even convince herself to call him. But she had made herself a promise, she was not going to treat him any differently simply because he was famous. Famous or not, he was still a human, just like her. Comforted by this thought, she turned the corner to enter the shop, but ran into another person with the exact same intention. A pair of strong hands caught her arm, steadying her.

"I'm so sorry," she apologized and then looked up to see two piercing blue eyes, belonging to none other than Richard Castle.

"Its okay," he chuckled, releasing her arm, "Nice running into you again," Rick told her and held the door open.

"Thanks," Kate said and smiled as she entered. The only other man in her life who had ever held a door for her was her father. Even her boyfriends hadn't done it. However, she was used to taking charge and barging ahead, so she rarely gave anyone the time or opportunity to offer.

"Let's sit there, I'll get us some coffee," Rick told Kate and pointed towards a low table and two big armchairs in the corner. Kate nodded and made her way to the table, sliding her coat off her shoulders.

Getting comfy in one of the armchairs, she saw Rick heading towards her with two, big, steaming mugs.

"Here you go," he said as he sat down himself, handed one of the mugs to Kate.

"So you're a cop?" Rick asked after a moment of silence, which to Kate's surprise, wasn't awkward at all.

"Just made Detective actually," she said proudly and Ricks eyebrows rose.

"Aren't you a little young for that?"

"Yeah," she nodded and carefully placed the mug back on the table.

"Which department?" he continued.

"I've been working homicide for a couple of months, now. I really like it, so I think I'll stay there," Kate told him, seeing a big smile covering his face.

"You know what?" he asked as she shook her head. "We just became best friends."

* * *

It had been hours since they had walked into the little coffee shop together.

Somehow the topics had changed and they were now talking about their everyday lives, which on Kate's side included chasing suspects and running around the town. Four empty coffee mugs were sitting on the table between them. Kate's stomach hurt from all the laughing, yet she couldn't stop, curling into a ball in her seat.

"You seriously stole a police horse?" she asked, practically howling with laughter.

"Borrowed," Rick corrected her, laughing himself. "I was going to return it...someday."

"Now I have to find that incident report," she told him and his eyes went wide. As a detective Kate knew exactly what that meant. "Oh, so there's something you're not telling me..."

"You're good. But I'm not going to tell you." There was no way he was going to divulge that he had been naked at the time. Too embarrassing.

"You know I could just get that file, right? That's my job after all," she told him, innocently.

"I don't doubt it, Detective," he admitted, "Fine, I was naked at the time." He waited for her reaction.

She just sat there and looked at him with curious eyes; "Why?"

"It was spring," he shrugged, and after a moment's beat, they both started laughing again. Kate felt like she was a teenager again. She couldn't remember the last time she'd had such a light and carefree afternoon, being a homicide detective and all.

Somewhere between the laughter Rick felt his phone vibrating in his pocket. He gave Kate a significant look and then answered; "Castle."

"Darling, it's me," he heard his mothers voice. "I'm in a hurry. I just got called in for audition and I can't very well leave Alexis here all by herself." Rick found himself wondering what kind of auditions took place on Sunday afternoons.

"Okay, just give me 20 minutes and I'll be there." He sighed and ended the call.

Kate looked at him, waiting for explanation.

"It was my mother, she can't watch Alexis anymore, so I have to take off," he told her and got up.

"Who's Alexis?"

"My daughter," he answered, wrapping his scarf around his neck. "She's six, so not quite ready to be home alone."

Oh, right. He had a daughter. She'd heard it mentioned from time to time in various papers and magazines. She really should have remembered. "Yeah, you should run then," she told him, getting up herself, reaching for her coat.

"Thanks for understanding," he said and she nodded. "This was fun, we should have coffee more often."

"Maybe we should, but you really need to go," she reminded him and he smiled. He really liked her. She was intelligent, beautiful and absolutely hilarious. And she had a real job. She wasn't just some model, earning money with her looks, she actually used her brain.

"Bye, Rick," she told him, snapping him out of his thoughts.

"Bye, Kate. I'll call you," he promised and then hurried out the door.

Kate slid back into her seat. She had just had a two hour long conversation with Rick Castle and it had actually been fun. Really fun. They were definitely doing that again.

She brushed her hair out of her face and glanced over at the table to see if she had forgotten anything. That's when she saw the small black notebook laying on the table, next to one of the coffee mugs. It was Ricks. She had seen him earlier taking notes about few things she said, but the little book had been forgotten the minute they stopped talking about murders.

She picked it up, but didn't open it. Every person needed their privacy. She put the little book in her coat pocket and then got up again. It was time for her to go, too. She'd let him know about the notebook as soon as she got home.

But for now, it was like a promise to her that they'd meet again...

* * *

**Hey, so another chapter, or well, actually one half of it cause i tought it would get too long. But let me know, should i write longer chapters?**

**Anyway, enjoy and i'll try to update agan ASAP:)**

**PS! Reviews are always welcomed!**

**Love, Eva!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

Kate sat behind her desk at the precinct, going through some papers. This case didn't have any leads, none that lead somewhere significant anyway. It had been two days and she was starting to get stressed. Feeling that her mind couldn't take it any longer, she stood up and headed to the break room for coffee. It always helped her think.

The coffee in this place was basically crap, but since it served its purpose she had no reason to be picky.

"Yo, Beckett," she heard Esposito say by the door and spun around.

"We went through the vic's financial records again, and guess what?" he asked, clearly impressed with himself.

"What?" Kate asked and took a sip of her coffee.

"Our vic made monthly payments to this account," he said and handed her some papers. Kate quickly flipped through them and shook her head.

"Doesn't ring a bell. So we have a new suspect?" she asked when she raised her head.

"Nope, an old one. I could only get the address of the owner, and guess who it is?"

"The ex-wife?" she guessed, not having a clue who it could be. The victim was a middle aged, divorced man, with two kids and a high class design company. The man was basically swimming in money and that alone drew more suspects than the ordinary case.

"And you're wrong again. It was the son," said Ryan who had just approached them.

"Are you sure?" Kate asked.

"Yeah, we double checked, it's him." Ryan told her and bumped fists with Esposito.

"Well let's get this son of a bitch, then," she said, already heading to her desk to get her gun.

Since Ryan and Esposito were officially partners, she rode alone. And she didn't mind, it gave her time to think.

Rick hadn't called her, yet, but she wasn't concerned about it. He would soon notice the absence of his notebook. At least she hoped so. Actually, she was surprised that he hadn't already realized it was missing.

Taking another turn to the right she parked in front of a big house, a couple of blocks away from the private school she used to attend when she was a little girl.

Kate got out of her car and checked the holster for her gun. It was still there, placed securely on her hip. The gun always served to give her the added courage she needed.

She waited a bit for the boys to arrive so she could have some kind of a back up if she ever needed it, though she really hoped she didn't. Being saved by anyone made her feel weak. And Kate was in no way a weak person.

"Finally, I thought you were never getting here," Kate told Esposito and Ryan when they approached her.

"There were no parking spots here, so we had to leave our car all the way down the street," Ryan told her, apologetically, flashing her a smile.

They walked through the lobby and up the stairs, not speaking another word. When they reached the apartment, Esposito knocked on the door and yelled, "NYPD, open the door."

When there was no response he gave the door a hard kick so it flung open, just in time for them to see a man escaping through the window and running down the fire escape.

"You two follow him, I'll go back the way we came and try to cut him off," Kate said, already running for the stairs. She closed her hand around the handle of her gun as she made her way towards the busy street. She saw the man running the other way. Damn, it wasn't the way she'd hoped.

Running after him was harder due to the crowded street, but the suspect didn't have any leverage at this point. Seeing Esposito run out of the alley, not far ahead she slowed her steps, knowing that he would get him. She turned her head to see where Ryan was but didn't stop running.

Next moment she felt the air being pushed out of her lungs as she stumbled right into someone.

"Shit!" Kate groaned and rolled herself on her back. Breathing slowly, she lifted her head and saw who she had run into. Rick Castle.

"We really need to stop meeting like this," she told him and saw how his eyes widened when he turned around.

"Oh my god, Kate, I'm sorry, are you okay?" he asked and kneeled beside her to help her sit.

Feeling her side, Kate examined the spot where his elbow had hit her. Yep, there was going to be a bruise, later.

"Yeah, I'm fine," she told him and Rick helped her up. When they were back on the same level he didn't let go of her arm.

"Daddy, are you okay?" a little voice asked from the left and Rick released her arm. Kate turned to look at the little girl standing beside them. She had bright orange hair and the same ice blue eyes as Rick. Oh, that was Alexis, Kate realized.

"Yes, pumpkin, I'm fine," he told her and ran a hand through her hair.

"I'm really sorry 'bout my dad." the little girl said, turning to Kate and she was surprised how mature she sounded.

"It's okay, I'm not mad at him," Kate told her and Alexis smiled.

"I'm Alexis by the way and this is my dad, Rick," she continued, pointing at her father. Rick chuckled.

"I know, we had coffee once. And I'm Kate," she said and gently shook the little hand the girl was offering her.

"Are you a police officer?" she asked, pointing at her badge.

"I'm a detective, actually."

"Okay," Alexis replied, clearly not understanding the difference. "Maybe you could have an ice cream with us? Like an apology? Is it alright, Daddy?" she asked and turned to her father for confirmation.

"Yeah, sure, Kate. I'd really like if you'd come." He told her and Kate wanted so badly to take them up on the offer.

"I'm sorry, guys, but I can't. I have to go back to work," she said and gave them a sad smile.

"Alright, but how about a dinner, tomorrow night at our house. We'll cook," he suggested desperately wanting for her to say yes.

"Sure." Kate told him and saw Alexis smile widely. The little girl was cute with her pigtails and the little pink coat. She didn't mind spending some time with her. And for some weird reason she had missed Rick. It didn't seem logical, as she hardly knew him. But he was good company and she could really use it.

"Really?" Rick asked, making her look at him again.

"No, I was just playing you. Of course, I was serious," She told him and Alexis laughed.

"Daddy, you're silly. She already told you that she's coming." Alexis giggled and looked up at Kate, "So can you come tomorrow?"

"Yeah, tomorrow's fine," she told the little redhead and took the piece of paper that Rick was handing her. "What's this?"

"My address. You know, you'll need it if you were serious about coming," Rick said and Kate rolled her eyes. it was a bad habit but she never got herself to leave it, it came too naturally.

"I'm coming. What time should I be there?"

"Around six, if that's okay with you," he answered and Kate glanced around to see Esposito walking down the street with their suspect who now had his hands cuffed behind his back.

"Yeah, it's perfect. I gotta go now, but I'll see you tomorrow?" she told them and saw Esposito eying her.

"See you tomorrow," Rick said and Alexis waved at her, "Bye, Kate. It was nice to meet you."

"Likewise. Bye, Alexis." she told the little girl and then turned around to follow Esposito who had already passed them.

"I see everything went well," she said to Esposito when she caught up with the other Detective. He nodded so Kate continued, "Where's Ryan?"

Esposito opened his mouth to answer but before he could, Ryan appeared from the alley before them, a bit messy. His tie was a little off center and he was breathing heavily.

"Took a wrong turn," he explained when the other two looked at him, curiously.

"Sure you did, bro," the other Detective said with a smirk in his voice. Poor Ryan, Kate thought, always the unlucky one.

"I'll see you back at the station," she told them and crossed the road to where she had parked her car. Getting inside, she started the engine and sped off.

Kate was smiling and she knew it was because of Rick. And Alexis too. The little girl seemed really sweet and a little mature for her age. She wondered where her was mother and what was the story between her and Rick. But then again, it was none of her business. She had a past herself and someday, maybe she could share it with him.

* * *

**Hey! So i'm going to start writing longer chapters like some of you suggested but i had already written this one so here it is.:) Also i wanna thank MsKitten who edited this for me since my first language isn't english and saved you all from my weird mistakes.**

**Anyway, enjoy, leave reviews and i'll try to update ASAP like always:)**

**Eva xo**


	6. Chapter 6

**AN: So this is the first chapter i'll start with an apology. I'm so sorry for leaving this story for a month and im not gonna do this again. My crazy life will not stop me from writing:) Big thank you to my beta HannahbananaJane and MsKitten for making this chapter readable!**

**So enjoy and leave some reviews so i could know what you think:)**

* * *

**Chapter 6**

Kate glanced at her watch, even though she knew there was no possible way that she could head out just yet. It was odd. Never before had she been so eager to leave work early. It was only a little past three and there was still paperwork to be done. There was just no way she was getting out early, like she had hoped.

Turning the next page, she sighed and started all over again. Her hand was beginning to cramp up. She was so focused on her task that she didn't even notice when the captain came out of his office and approached her desk.

"Beckett, are you almost finished?" he asked and Kate winced, her eyes looking at the older man.

"No, sir. I still have some left," she said and waved her hand at her desk, where the papers were piled up in a small tower. Even though half of it was done, she'd still need a few more hours to finish up.

"Go home, and send the boys home too. You've been working too hard this week, anyway," Roy told the Detective and smiled. When you thought about their family in the 12th, she was like a daughter to him, and he was not happy to see any of them doing so much overtime.

"Okay, thank you," Kate replied, astonished. It wasn't often that their Captain let them go before 5 and today Kate was beyond grateful. She gathered up the papers and placed them neatly on the edge of her desk. Grabbing her bag she headed over to the boys, who still had their noses buried in files.

"Hey, Montgomery told us to go home," Kate told them.

"It's a little past 3, that can't be right," Ryan started when Esposito smacked him on the back of his head.

"Don't complain about things like this," Esposito warned Ryan as he moved past him with his chair. Shaking her head, Kate turned around and waved them goodbye.

"See you tomorrow," she heard Ryan shout after her, but she was already inside the elevator.

Leaving the precinct was always good. Not that she didn't like her job, she loved it, but as she walked out, she felt how serious Detective Beckett was left behind and she was just Kate again.

Getting into her car, she turned on the radio and drove down the street. Stopping at one red light, she found herself humming along to a song. She hadn't been in this good mood for a long time. Actually the good mood had lasted almost a week. Which, following her mother's death had become a rare thing. It was better now, time had allowed her to heal a bit, but she was still damaged. Her death had left a lasting mark on Kate and she wasn't sure she'd ever be able to fully put it behind her.

Kate parked in front of her building and climbed the stairs to her floor. She never liked to use the elevator, it was just too slow. Working her way into her apartment she kicked off her high heels and hung her coat in the closet. Then she took her gun and badge and locked them inside a small drawer in her bedroom. She didn't feel comfortable bringing her gun with her this time.

The clothes felt dirty, as they almost always did after visiting a crime scene. Shower, she needed a shower.

20 minutes later she was standing in front of her closet, towel-drying her hair. _It's not like anybody beside me really cares what I'm wearing_, she thought as she picked out her favorite jeans and a dark blue shirt with three quarter sleeves. Leaving her hair to dry on its own she moved on to her make-up. Again, not much, just enough to cover the little bags under her eyes. She hardly noticed them anymore.

Ever since she had made Detective she'd been working harder than ever. She didn't even have enough time for her mother's case, which worried her. Not that there was much to worry about, given that she still didn't have any new leads and everything else were just dead ends. She couldn't give up the case, it felt just like giving up on her mother altogether, failing her and Kate didn't want to do that. She knew she had to be careful, though. The case had almost destroyed her once and she didn't want to go down that rabbit hole again.

When she was satisfied with her appearance, she grabbed a leather jacket and purse and was just about to walk out of the apartment when she remembered the black notebook. It was lying on the table by the couch. It was tempting, seeing it there, but she resisted the urge to read it every time. It was not meant for her to read. She took the notebook and stuffed it into her bag along with her gloves, phone and wallet.

Once outside she hailed a cab and gave the driver the address Rick had given her earlier. She never really used cabs as she had her car, not to mention her bike that she hardly ever rode anymore. But right now it'd be too cold for that anyway.

The weather in New York was colder than it had been in years, and Kate really hoped that this year they might just get a white Christmas. She used to love snow as a kid. They would go upstate to visit her grandparents with her mom and dad, but both of them had passed away around the time she was 15.

When the cabby pulled up at Rick's building she paid and got out.

She walked through the lobby, feeling weird when the doorman greeted her by name and got into the elevator. There was a relaxing music in the background, just like in movies. She felt nervous when the doors slid open.

When Kate approached the door she took a few calming breaths to slow her heartbeat and knocked. She immediately heard footsteps, too light to belong to an adult.

The door opened and she was looking down at the little redhead.

"Hi, Alexis," Kate told her and the girl opened the door a little more to let her in.

"Hi, Kate. Daddy's cooking dinner, but he's almost finished." Alexis pointed towards the kitchen.

Kate looked around, feeling a bit out of place. This place was huge. You could easily fit her apartment in here at least 3 times. Rick was standing by the kitchen island, stirring something in a pot.

"Hey, Kate," he called out to her as she removed her coat, "Just hang it in the closet on your right."

She did as told and then found herself being dragged towards the kitchen by Alexis.

"Hey," she greeted Rick from the other side of the island. "You need any help?" she offered not really knowing what to do with herself. It wasn't really awkward, but it was definitely the closest to awkward they had gotten so far.

"No, I'm almost done. Alexis, would you mind showing Kate around a bit. I'll let you know when its time for dinner," Rick told them and Kate felt how Alexis pulled her by her hand. She let the little girl lead her around the living room.

Kate looked around and her eye caught on some pictures on the shelves. One of them was Alexis in a pink tutu. Kate thought it was adorable.

"You dance ballet?" she asked the little girl who nodded enthusiastically in return.

"I've been dancing since I was four. This picture was taken this spring." Alexis told her and then continued, a little shy, "Do you know how to do a ballerina bun?"

"I think I remember. I used to know how to make a lot of braids," she told the redhead and her face lit up.

"Would you do one for me?" she asked Kate, who sat down on the black, leather couch.

"Yeah, why not," she told Alexis and patted on the couch right next to her. "You need to stay in one place if you're serious about this braid," Kate warned her and remembered how hard it had been for her to remain still when her mother used to braid her hair. Of course, that was a long time ago.

"So you can really do it? I mean Daddy usually does my hair, but he can only do pig tales," the little girl told her as she looked at Kate.

"Of course. I said I would," Kate answered and gestured for her to turn around. "Any preferences?"

"No, just something pretty, please," she replied and rested her hands in her lap. Kate was a little surprised how calmly Alexis sat. At her age, Kate had been like a tornado.

"So do you like school?" Kate asked her after a moment of silence that didn't seem to bother either of them.

"Yeah, I love it. You don't think I'm weird, do you?" Alexis wanted to know and tried to turn her head but Kate hands held it in place.

"No, I think it's really cool that you think so," she told her honestly.

"Really? You don't think I'm weird 'cause I am a little different?"

"No, different isn't weird, it's special. You just have to get a little older to understand that." Kate finished the second French braid. "You're all done," she informed her and Alexis jumped up.

"Thank you," she squealed and gave Kate a hug. Kate who was taken by surprise wrapped her arms around Alexis in return and then whispered, "Anytime."

"Your dinner is served," she heard Rick's voice from the kitchen. Alexis ran into the dining room before Kate could even react. She just followed the girl. Halfway there she could already smell the dinner.

"Wow, Rick it smells amazing," she told him as she approached the table and sat down on one of the vacant chairs.

"Yeah, I like to cook. I know it may sound weird, but I had to feed myself since my mother was always working, and that's how I developed my awesome cooking skills," he told her and handed her a bowl of pasta.

"I used to cook, too, but I don't find the time anymore. I just eat too much takeout," she admitted and accepted the sauce from him.

"Daddy, why can't we have Chinese every night?" Alexis wondered.

"Because Friday is for take out. And may I say that you, my little princess, look awfully lovely," he told Alexis and the girl grinned back. "Would you reveal your secret?" he asked as he poured a little sauce over Alexis's pasta.

"I don't know, Kate did my hair," she told her father and giggled.

"Did she now? Must be a some kind of magic," Rick answered.

"No magic, just a lot of practice," Kate confirmed, smiling.

As they ate their dinner, Kate thought about her last family dinner. It had been on her dad's birthday in September. It was quiet like usual and the absence of her mother was more obvious than ever. That's why she didn't like family dinners, her family was broken.

When Rick stood up and suggested that she and Alexis play a boarding game while he cleaned the table, Kate started to laugh.

"What?" he exclaimed.

"You cooked the whole dinner. Do you seriously think I'm going to let you do the dishes all alone?" she asked him and stood up. She gathered the plates and now empty pasta bowl and went to the kitchen. Rick followed her.

"You're a guest. You shouldn't be doing dishes," he argued but Kate didn't listen to him and turned on the water.

"I feel weird when I have nothing to do. You can still dry if you really want," she replied and Rick grabbed the towel from the counter.

"It still feels wrong," he started when Kate cut him off.

"Oh, shut up. I don't mind."

"Like you didn't mind braiding Alexis' hair earlier," he wanted to know.

"Again, I didn't mind. She's a sweet girl," Kate told him just as Alexis ran into the room.

"Hey, pumpkin, slow down," Rick told her and caught Alexis with both hands.

"I wanted to tell you that I chose a movie, so maybe Kate could stay and watch it with us," Alexis whispered loud enough for Kate to hear.

"I don't know sweetie, why don't you ask Kate?" he whispered back and looked at Kate.

"Kate, will you watch a movie with us?" Alexis asked her, this time louder.

"Yes, I would love to," she answered and the redhead's face lit up. Kate knew she was grinning, herself.

Alexis grabbed her hand and guided her back into the living room. Kate sat down on the couch exactly like earlier and watched as the girl picked out a DVD case and handed it to Rick when he approached.

"What are we watching?" Kate asked Alexis when she came to sit by her on the couch.

"The Princess and the Frog," Alexis answered and Kate tried to remember if she'd ever seen it. Actually she had never heard of it before. Of course she was 24 and didn't spend a lot of time watching Disney movies. She hardly had time to watch TV in general.

"Is it new?" She turned to Rick when he sat down on the other side of Alexis.

"Yeah. We had to go to the movies 4 times and then when I bought her the DVD she watched it every night for a week," he told her and Kate laughed softly.

Somewhere in the middle of the movie Kate felt how Alexis leaned against her and soon she was asleep, one little arm wrapped around Kate's hand. She was warm against her, and it had a lulling effect on her.

Rick, who saw that she was no longer focusing on the movie, took the remote and turned the TV off. "I'm sorry about that," he told her and Kate looked up.

"It's fine. She's actually really warm," she whispered and watched how Alexis snuggled closer to her, a question popping into her mind. "What happened to her mom?" she asked on impulse.

A second later she realized what she had just said, "No, don't tell me. Forget I ever asked." Great, she had the gift to make any situation awkward or uncomfortable.

"No, it's okay. And if you want to know I'll tell you. We got divorced. She moved to LA to act. The end," he said after a moment and Kate felt her body relax.

"Does she get to see her at least?"

"Meredith visits a few times a year and Alexis misses her while she's gone, but she was never ready to be a mom. I'm actually surprised she lasted as long as she did," he answered and there was a hint of anger in his voice. What kind of a mother could live without their child, Kate wondered. But then again she knew what it must feel like for Alexis. Of course being dead and being on the other side of the country were two different things but the result was still the same.

"I'm sorry," she told him when nothing else came to her mind.

"So, Kate, I never asked you about your life," Rick changed the subject. He wanted to know more about her. Plus his ex-wife wasn't exactly his favorite topic.

"Then ask away," she whispered and looked down at Alexis to see that the little girl was still sleeping.

"What about your family?" he asked and Kate felt how her heart skipped a beat. She was not ready to tell him about her mother. Tonight had been _so_ good and she hardly wanted to ruin it with a heavy, emotional conversations. Of course, she knew that sooner or later she'd have to tell him about her mother or her last boyfriend, but this was all too soon.

She trusted Rick, but they had just met. A week ago they didn't even know each other. _No_, Kate thought, she knew him but he had no idea that she even existed.

"I'm an only child. No grandparents, just my dad." she told him, praying that it would be enough. Seriously, who was she kidding. He was a writer, there was no such thing as enough.

"What about a boyfriend?" he asked, surprising her. Kate hadn't expected that one.

"Um... no... no boyfriend, not anymore. Didn't work out." She realized that she would happily tell him all about her last bad relationship if that meant not having to talk about her mom.

"What happened, if you don't mind me asking?" Rick asked and wondered who would let a woman like Kate go. She was smart, he had known that pretty much right away. She was beautiful and funny. Everything one could want from a woman. This guy had to be an idiot.

"It. um... it didn't end well," she admitted. "He was an intern, worked a lot so we never spent much time together. Then one time when Esposito took me to the hospital as I had sprained my leg chasing down a suspect, I saw him kiss some other doctor. You know, when I asked him about it later he tried to lie. That it wasn't what I thought it was, the usual crap. I just kicked him out. Ant that's the last time I saw him," she shrugged and watched the steady rise and fall of Alexis's chest. She left out the part where he'd try hit her when she told him it was over. Good thing she was a trained cop.

Josh had walked away with a black eye, calling her a bitch.

"I'm sorry, I know the feeling. Trust me," he told her.

"And you know what's funny? I wasn't even angry with him. Sure, I was a little disappointed, but I guess I always knew that he was not a guy who'd last," she confessed. It was unusual for her to talk about her failed relationships so easily but maybe it was because Rick really did know how it felt. He had a failed marriage to prove it.

"That's the same thing that happened with Meredith. I'm just lucky I got Alexis out of it unharmed." He glanced at his daughter. "Speaking of, I really should take her to bed." He gave Kate an apologizing look.

"Oh, right..." she tried to move herself so Rick would be able to get Alexis. "This isn't working. I'll just take her, you point the way."

"Yeah, sure." Rick watched as she got up, holding Alexis in her arms.

She followed him up the stairs, carefully, not wanting to wake the little girl.

"Just put her on bed," Rick told her when they entered a room full of stuffed toys.

Kate placed Alexis down on the big bed, Rick put a stuffed monkey by her side and tucked her in. "She can't sleep without it," he explained and the two adults made their way out of the room.

"I should go, it's getting late," she told Rick as they walked downstairs.

"Okay, I'm just glad you came." He went and got her coat from the hallway closet and helped her into it, then watched as she wrapped her scarf around her neck. He was glad that she hadn't run off the moment she'd found out about Alexis. It had been his biggest worry. Kate was good with her, had even done her hair, which was more than her mother ever did for her.

Then she looked back at him, "You know, she's a great girl."

"I think I've heard it before," he joked, breaking the tension that had been rising between them.

"Oh, hey, before I forget. I think this is yours." Kate retrieved the little notebook from her bag, handing it to Rick who looked surprised. "Let me guess, you didn't even notice it was gone," she teased.

"Yeah. All I can remember are the things you said to me," he replied and Kate thought that there was something really sweet about his words. "You didn't read it, did you?" he continued, waving the little notebook in his hand.

"Some things aren't meant to be read," she simply answered. It had been really hard, though. "I really need to go now or otherwise we'll be standing here all night."

"I'll call you," he promised when Kate approached the door.

"Night, Rick," she said and then headed towards the elevator.

"Until next time, Kate," she heard Rick yell after her and shook her head. Couldn't this man just say goodnight?

* * *

**Thoughts?:D**


	7. Chapter 7

**AN: Well, my life is crazy before Christmas and i hardly have any time to write. This is going to change over christmas break. I'm also trying to get my drivers licences which is not easy at all...** **Anyway here's chapter 7. And i wanna thank MsKitten who also correctid all the previous chapters:) So BIG hug to her because without her this wouldn't be readable:)**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

Kate sat in the corner of the coffee shop, waiting for Rick to get there. It had been a week since the dinner at his loft and they had been out for coffee almost daily. It was becoming her favorite part of the day. The way he could get her to smile without even trying. Yeah, that was something new.

She was seriously considering telling him about her mom. It wasn't just because he could make her laugh or that he was one of her favorite authors. But on top of that he was a good listener and she needed somebody like that. Her mom's story wasn't something that she shared with a lot of people, but her closest friends knew. However she couldn't talk about it with her dad. With how he was finally doing better, there was just no way Kate get herself to ruin it.

She raised her head when she saw a shadow approaching her from the corner of her eye. It made her smile. He was always on time.

"Hey," he greeted her as he unwrapped his striped scarf and took of his coat.

"Hi," she replied with a smile.

"So, no dangerous criminals to catch today?" he asked jokingly. Secretly he was happy that she didn't have to work. Maybe this conversation wouldn't be cut short because of a dead body.

"No, they must not like the cold that much," she answered and bit into her bear claw.

"Well, I love it. I mean I haven't had a white Christmas since forever. Alexis wasn't even born then."

"It's not Christmas yet so don't push your luck," she warned and looked out the window.

The street was covered by a thin layer of snow and thousand of little snowflakes were floating down from the sky. The trees were already covered with Christmas lights and most of the stores were selling Christmas stuff. Still it was several weeks away, and Kate never understood why they had to start with it that early.

"Speaking of Alexis, she has been asking for you," Rick said casually and looked at Kate.

She was silent for a moment, clearly surprised but then asked, "Really?" It made her feel special for no specific reason.

"Yeah, she wants you to come over again. I'd say you made a really good first impression. But you can say no if you want," he said quickly, giving her a way out if she wanted.

Kate thought about it for a second and then replied, "No, I'd love to. I've been having a pretty rough time at work, but I'm sure I could do another dinner." She gave him a smile.

Rick let out a breath he didn't even realize he'd been holding and returned the smile.

"So when are you free?" he continued, not about to let the topic drop.

"How about this Friday? I'm not on duty so I won't be called away."

"Sounds perfect. Though, I should warn you that my mother might stop by. Don't worry she's not scary, but she can be a bit... overwhelming," he grimaced.

"Oh, she can't be that bad," Kate reassured him. "I mean, she's your mother. You'd probably do anything for her," she continued and felt a slight ache in her heart. She didn't even have a chance to say goodbye to her mom.

"You're right. She helped a lot when Meredith took off. And she raised me, and for that I'm forever thankful," he said and then his face grew cloudy. Kate saw it immediately.

"What's wrong?" she asked and leaned a bit closer to him.

"It's nothing really. I shouldn't be bothering you with my problems," he tried, but when Kate gave him a look, he continued. "It's about Meredith. She wants Alexis to spend Christmas with her this year. But she doesn't want to go. I can't figure out why."

"Maybe because she's still hurt that her own mother left her for a job?" Kate suggested.

"No, she's too young to understand that."

"Don't underestimate her. She might understand a lot more that you think. She's six, not stupid, after all," Kate pointed out, making him chuckle.

"I think you're right. I feel like I just called my daughter stupid." He smiled. "You know what? I wont bother you with my life dramas anymore. Tell me, what are you going to do over Christmas?"

"Work, probably," she admitted and saw disappointment in his eyes.

"Seriously? You have to work on Christmas?" he asked. "You should spend it with your family."

"Christmas doesn't stop people from killing each other," she murmured and a silence fell between them.

After her mother's death nothing had been the same. She still ate dinner with her father and exchanged gifts with her friends but the warm, fuzzy feeling that she loved about Christmas was gone. She hoped that one day she'd get it back.

He was just about to ask something when her phone buzzed and she gave him an apologizing look.

"Beckett."

"You need to come in," came Esposito's voice on the other end.

"Why? Has there been a murder?" She wasn't on call which made this call even weirder.

"No, but we found something about this case that went cold a few weeks ago," he replied.

"You mean the one that Sanderson's team couldn't solve? Why are you investigating that?"

"They found something new but since they already have a case, we had to look into it," he explained. Kate shook her head. It was typical for them to finish Sanderson's cases. He owed her at least a month of paperwork.

"Okay, I'll come right away." She promised and ended the call.

"You're going?" He asked and when she nodded his eyes grew sad. "I was hoping to spend the afternoon with you."

"I'm sorry, they found a lead on this case that went cold a few weeks ago. I really need to go," she apologized and wrapped her scarf around her neck before reaching for her coat.

"Okay, but call me later?"

"I promise," she said before running out of the door.

The bitter cold chilled her to the bone as she headed to her car across the street.

What could be that important that they would call her in on her day off. Ever since joining the force this had happened to her only once, and that had been because of a serial killer. She really hoped that this wouldn't be the same.

She arrived at the precinct and parked her car in an underground garage. She collected her purse and gloves and hurried to the elevator. When she reached the homicide floor she felt everyone's gaze upon her.

Feeling more confident, she walked to her desk and looked around for the boys.

That's when she felt a hand on her shoulder and looked up. It was Montgomery.

"My office, Beckett," he told her and despite it being an order, his voice remained soft.

Something wasn't right. Kate could feel it, but nobody seemed interested in telling her what was going on.

"Take a seat," Montgomery told her when she entered his spacious office and closed the door behind her. She hesitated for a second but then sat down in one of the armchairs near the wall.

"Beckett, I have some news to tell you," he paused for a moment and when Kate was about to open her mouth he continued. "It's about your mother."

"What is it?" she asked, her grip on the armchair tightening.

"You remember that stabbing case that went cold? Well, our ME was able to match the knife marks to another victim. Another case that went cold two years ago."

Kate let out a breath. Her mother was killed five years ago. She had a feeling that that wasn't all, though.

"So, while we reviewed the case file, we found a connection to three other victims. And one of them was your mom," Montgomery finished and watched how Kate opened and closed her mouth several times before managing to speak again.

"What's the connection?" she asked quietly but the Captain heard her.

"The murder weapon. Beckett, this is probably the same man that killed your mother."

He was sad to see how much pain this news caused her. He knew everything about her rookie days. Even though she was probably one of the best cops in the precinct she still had her flaws. Everybody did. He knew how she had tried to solve her mother's case, how she'd barely slept and sometimes didn't eat for days. But she managed to survive, somehow. She'd realized that this case was going to destroy her if she didn't stop.

Kate felt how her stomach twisted and she fought the urge to throw up. This couldn't be happening. She'd been doing so well. She was finally living again and there was no way she wanted to go back down the rabbit hole.

She could stay out of this. Take a short vacation. She knew that Montgomery wouldn't let her work the case, anyway, even if she was there. So, the only chance she had of solving the case herself was to step down and work in secret. The boys would help her, she was certain about that. She could do this. She needed closure, but she wouldn't lose her sense of reality this time.

"Sir, I have some unused vacation days. I would like to take a few," she said, her voice was strong again. She wasn't the same woman anymore, the one who'd almost destroyed herself.

"I think that's a good idea," Montgomery agreed, a bit surprised. "Take as long as you need," he told her, and with that she was dismissed.

"Did Captain tell you..." Ryan asked when she came out, but before he could get any further Kate snapped, "I don't want to talk about this."

"So where are you going?" He tried again.

"Home," she answered and rushed towards the elevator.

"Yeah, right..." she heard someone say, but she didn't look back.

It took her exactly 40 minutes to get home, and when she did she couldn't contain it anymore.

She broke down.

She cried about everything that was wrong in her life. Her mother's death, her father's alcohol problems. She even cried about her last relationship, that hadn't ended well. Why was her life such a mess?

She cursed herself for being weak. She needed to pull herself together, but there was no chance for that right now. One thing she had learned was that when you break down, there's nothing you can do about it. She just had to cry it out.

Tears streamed down her face as she sat on her couch, staring into space.

At some point the tears stopped, leaving her with swollen, red eyes and salty cheeks. She lay there, hoping to drift into a much needed sleep, but she had no such luck. The sky turned dark, but she still remained on the couch, her body beginning to ache from her uncomfortable position.

When her phone started ringing on the kitchen table, she ignored it. She didn't want to get up, yet. But the ringing didn't stop so she finally stretched her legs and got up.

She walked into the kitchen, not bothering to turn on the lights, her phone all lit up on the table.

"Yeah?" she answered without checking who the caller was.

"Kate, is everything okay?" Rick asked and she smiled. She was supposed to call him and because all of this she'd forgotten.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just tired." she lied, forcing her voice to sound as normal as she could manage. Rick didn't buy it.

"Kate, what happened?" he asked again, and she took a few calming breaths before answering.

"Nothing. Just a hard day at work" It wasn't exactly a lie but it was far from the truth.

"Kate, where do you live?" he asked out of the blue.

"No, Rick you're not coming over," she told him, realizing why he was asking that.

"I can't promise that. I can hear you need a friend," he tried insisting, but Kate shook her head.

"No. I don't want to talk about it, so just drop it, okay?" she demanded, a little more determined this time.

"Okay," he sighed. "Try to get some sleep. I'll call you in the morning. Bye," he said and after she mumbled her quiet response he disconnected the call.

She needed to do something, get her mind of things. She looked around in her apartment and found one of Castle's novels lying on the small table by the couch.

She sat down, cuddling up with a blanket and opened the book at a random page. It didn't matter what page, she knew all his a bit too well. They were her escape, something that she had discovered a few years back. They offered the closure that she herself had never got.

Kate was so wrapped up in the story that she jumped when a slight knock on the door brought her out of it. She put down the book, and headed to the hall to open the door.

"Rick," she breathed when she saw him standing on the other side, his bright blue eyes staring into hers, and a small smile covering his lips.

That smile disappeared when he spotted her red eyes and traces of tears on her cheeks. She looked down, uncomfortable with him seeing her like this.

"Can I come in?" he breaks the silence.

"Sure," she nods and steps aside, letting him in. "How did you know where I lived?" she asked, turning around to find him studying his surrounding.

"I called Esposito. You used my phone to call him last week, so I still had the number," he confessed and she shook her head. She wasn't even mad. She was actually happy to have him here.

"So, what really happened?" he asked her and this time she decided not to lie.

They sat down on the couch and Rick listened as she told him the story about a 19 year old girl who lost her mother. How she obsessed over the case, completely burying herself in it, closing herself off from the world. She told him about her dad, and how he'd turned to the bottle, incapable of staying sober for more than three months at the tame, and how she in turn had become a detective.

When she finished, the tears were back and running down her stinging cheeks.

Rick pulled her in and wrapped his arms tightly around her body, her head resting on his chest. They stayed like this for a while and she felt her eyelids grew heavy. She rested one of her hands on his shoulder and looked up. She felt like she needed to say something.

"Thank you," she whispered.

"For what?"

"For being here, for coming over even thought I told you not to," she answered quietly and felt how he pressed his cheek against her head.

"Always," he answered quietly and that was the last thing she heard before falling asleep.

* * *

**So what do you think?:)**

**PS! It's less that 2 weeks until Christmas!**

**XO Eva**


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

Kate opened her eyes and blinked twice. It was early morning judging by the light coming through the living room window. She felt a hand around her waist and was suddenly afraid to move. The events of the previous night came back to her and her lips curled up in a small smile.

Rick was warm and heavy against her back and she didn't want to move. She felt him snuggle closer to her in his sleep and she didn't pull away. It felt kind of right and Kate didn't want to over-think things.

But it was true that Rick understood her a lot better that anyone she'd ever known. He made her smile and he had this amazing little daughter who...

Shit, probably needed him to wake her up and take her to school.

"Rick," she whispered and turned around in his arms, facing him.

"Rick, wake up," she tried again when there was no response to her previous attempt.

He blinked his blue eyes once, twice and when he realized where he was, he smiled.

"Morning," he mumbled and gazed into Kate's green eyes. She looked sleepy and she had amazing bed hair, strands of hair falling out of a messy bun. He had to resist the urge to push them back with his fingers.

"Rick, don't you need to take Alexis to school?" she asked.

He stirred immediately and took a look at his watch. "Not, possible," he murmured and looked at Kate. He didn't want to leave. So much had happened last night. Kate had opened up to him, not something she did really easily, and that meant so much.

"I'm really sorry," he began, but Kate quickly shook her head, cutting him off from what he was going to say next.

"Don't be, go! Alexis needs you to take her to school," she said and smiled.

"Kate..." he hesitated.

"Stop it before I have to throw you out myself," she said, playfully and smiled.

She looked beautiful, Rick thought, with her messy hair and the sun coming through the open curtains, bathing her with its golden light.

Before his mind could go any further, he felt her hands on his shoulders, pushing him towards the door.

"I meant what I said. You need to go," she insisted, and this time he listened.

"Thank you for last night," he said before getting out.

"I'm the one who should be thanking you," Kate told him and shook her head.

He just smiled and turned to walk away when an idea hit him, making him spin around on the spot. "Hey, Kate wait."

"What?" she asked, clearly not impressed that he was wasting more of his precious time.

"Come out with us again. Alexis would love to see you." _So would I, _was left unspoken.

"If I say yes, will you leave?" she laughed.

"I promise," he answered, trying to be dead serious.

"Then, fine, I will come. Now go before I actually kick you out," she warned him, teasingly.

"Sure you'd be able to do that?" he questioned, making his way towards the elevator.

"Positive," Kate shouted after him and then the door slammed shut.

He shook his head and pushed the call button. Kate was going to kill him someday.

* * *

"Hey Pumpkin, are you dressed, yet?" Rick called out for his daughter as he finished cooking eggs and pancakes. He set them on the table between the strawberries and bacon, turning around just in time to see Alexis coming down the stairs.

"Morning, daddy," she said cheerfully and sat down at the table. "Is Kate coming over today?" she asked as Rick poured her orange juice.

"Yeah, she is. Actually she should be here any minute now." Just then there was a knock at the door.

"I'll race you," Rick told Alexis and the little girl took off before he had a chance to react.

"Hi, Kate!" he heard from the hall.

"Hi, Alexis," he heard her response and approached them.

"I'm not late, am I?" she asked when she saw Rick.

"No, just on time," he smiled and took her coat, hanging it in the closet. "Come, we were just about start breakfast." He led her to the table.

"Wow, I haven't seen such a brunch in a long time," she admitted.

"You don't do brunches?" Alexis asked as they each took a seat.

"No, I live alone."

"Doesn't it get lonely?" she wondered. Kate smiled and though about her last few days at home alone. She was officially on her vacation so she didn't have to go to the precinct for another week.

First she had cleaned her whole apartment, something that she didn't do very often as she just didn't have the time. She had cooked her own meals and used the time to relax.

"Well, sometimes," she answered, truthfully, "But I have a lot of great friends, and then I just hand out with them, like right now."

"_I'm_ your friend?" Alexis asked, surprised.

"Of course you are," Kate told her and laughed, "plus, you're my youngest friend, so that makes you kind of special."

"Daddy, did you hear that?" she asked as she turned to her father.

"Yes I did, Pumpkin," he said and took another bite of his pancake.

"I think you're my friend too," the little redhead said as she turned back to Kate.

Kate just smiled and continued eating. Ricks cooking put her own poor cooking skills to shame. Usually she didn't even have time to eat breakfast.

"So what do you want to do today," Kate asked Alexis when she had finished her plate.

"Can we go to the zoo? We haven't gone in ages!" she asked Kate, at the same time sneaking a glance at her father.

"I told you, we can do whatever you want," Kate said and nodded. Rick had phoned her yesterday, saying that Alexis was miserable cause Meredith didn't even pick up her phone so Alexis could wish her happy birthday. So Rick had asked Alexis what would make her happier and Alexis had wanted to see Kate. Now here she was, about to spend the day with her favorite 6 year old and she was happy about it. Her apartment was too clean anyway. Plus she had promised Rick that she'd go out with them again so this seamed like the perfect opportunity.

"Are you done?" Rick asked Alexis and when she nodded he picked up her plate and placed all the dirty dishes in the dish washer.

"Go get changed, you can't go to the zoo in your PJ pants," he told her and Alexis ran up the stairs immediately.

"Thank you for doing this," Rick told Kate when she helped him clan the table.

"I'm happy to, if I can help her by just being here. Besides, you did the same for me," she replied and put the juice container back into the fridge.

"Oh God, I hope you don't feel like you have to do this because I stayed with you two days ago." he said, horror in his voice slightly perceptible.

"Relax, Rick, I'm here because I want to be. I meant it earlier, Alexis is my friend, too and that's what friend do right? Help each other out," she said smiling and saw how the worry from his face disappeared.

Just then they heard Alexis coming down the stairs again, yelling, "Daddy, Kate, I'm ready, can we please go now?"

"Yeah, Rick, lets go. There's a very eager little redhead waiting for us in the hall," Kate told him, and took the last plate out of his hands.

"I still feel weird that I let a guest clean the table," he murmured but didn't resist.

They made their way to the hall and found Alexis fully dressed already, standing by the door.

"Come on, you're so slow," she whined.

Kate thought that she looked really cute with her pigtails, pink coat and colorful scarf.

She put her own brown coat on and searched for her gloves.

"Okay, lets go," Kate said and followed Alexis out the door. "Come on, or we're going to leave without you," she warned Rick.

"Yeah, I'm coming..." he mumbled and closed the door.

They got down to the street and Rick hailed a cab. Kate slid in first and Alexis after her.

They didn't speak much. Kate watched as the city passed by. It was a short ride, so before she knew it she was getting out of the cab and following Alexis into the zoo.

The little girl knew exactly where she was going.

"What's your favorite animal, Alexis?" Kate asked as the girl dragged her towards something.

"You'll see," she grinned.

Kate looked around and realized where they were headed. "Tigers? Really?"

"Yeah, they're orange, just like my hair," Alexis explained and Kate laughed. This girl and her logic. She spotted Rick watching them out of the corner of her eye.

"What?"

"Nothing, its just good to see her smiling," he replied, watching as the little girl giggled as the tiger carefully checked her out.

They spent the morning walking around the zoo. Alexis was so taken with Kate that when Rick offered to buy them all ice cream, Alexis opted to stay with Kate.

"When was the last time that you came to the zoo?" Alexis asked her as they sat down on a bench.

"I think I was about 13, so I haven't been here for a while," she admitted. "What about you? You seem to know every corner of this place."

"I love to come here with daddy. Though last time I came it was with Paige and her mom and dad," she said and suddenly her face grew sad. "My mom never does anything with me. She didn't even pick up her phone when I called her to wish her happy birthday."

"I know, your daddy told me. And it's okay to miss her and be angry with her, but I'm sure that she loves you," Kate told her and wrapped an arm around her tiny shoulders. She hated to see how sad she was, she deserved so much more.

"She left, I haven't seen her for months," she replied, her voice small and she hid her face into Kate's side.

"I'm so sorry, Alexis," was all she could say. She didn't know how to make this any better. Alexis' mom clearly needed to sort out her priorities. If you had a kid, they should come first.

"But you have your daddy, who, by the way, is the best daddy you could ever have," Kate told her after a moment and the little girl smiled.

"I know. Even Paige doesn't have a dad like mine."

Kate was happy that she had been able to find another not so emotional topic. She didn't have anything against emotions but feeling helpless or having no way to help someone was the worst feeling in the world.

"So, Paige is your best friend?"

"Yeah, I think. I mean, we play together a lot and she loves school too, just like me," the redhead told her and then turned around on the bench. "Daddy's coming back," she squealed and ran towards Rick.

"Are you sure that you don't want anything?" he asked Kate and she shook her head. "After all I was the on who asked you to come today."

"No, you suggested it, I agreed. Stop thinking that I don't want to be here," she told him as she rolled her eyes.

"We should get back, she's going to get tired soon and will probably fall asleep," Rick pointed out and Kate agreed. She'd had a good time today with Alexis and Rick.

"Come, eat lunch at the loft," Rick offered, and without thinking she gave a small nod. Besides, if Rick was offering to fed her with his home cooked, delicious food, how could she say no?

Alexis talked through the whole cab ride back home about everything she had seen. Kate watched her with amusement, thinking how little things like going to the zoo could make children happy.

"Are you really tired?" Rick asked Alexis as he opened the lofts door.

"A bit," Alexis yawned.

"Go wash your hands while I heat the lasagna we made last night, and then you can go take a nap," he said as he approached the kitchen.

Kate took off her coat and hung it in the closet, no need to bother Rick, and sat down on one of the stools beside the kitchen island.

"Thank you, really, for coming today," he said again and looked at Kate. "She really needed it"

"Don't thank me, I was happy to. Plus I promised once not so long ago that I would go out with you two again," she explained and Rick laughed.

"Right, so you're just here because of your promise," he teased her.

"Well, that and the food is pretty good," she shrugged and then they heard Alexis entering the room.

"You wanna eat here?" Rick asked her, handing her a plate with food.

"Yeah, it's closer to bed," she said and dug into her food.

"Wow, you must be really tired," Kate said as Rick handed her a plate.

"A bit, but it was fun. I'm still glad you came," the redhead answered.

"I'm glad you asked me to," she replied truthfully. She really was glad, her vacation was slowly starting to get on her nerves. She was an active person and having too much free time on her hands didn't feel right. So, she worked out twice as much and did normal things like cleaning and cooking. Her favorite was reading Castle's books but she wasn't going to tell him that. And now, hanging out with Alexis. She definitely needed to add that one to her list of favorite free time activities.

"I'm done," Alexis announced and pushed her plate away.

"Well, you can go and take your nap," Rick said to her and Alexis nodded.

"Kate?" she asked just when she was about to climb the stairs.

"Yes, sweetie?"

"Will you be here when I wake up?"

She thought about it for a second and looked at Rick. He gave her a small smile, telling her that it was her decision.

"Yeah, I will," she promised and Alexis grinned before turning her back to them and disappearing up the stairs.

"So, what now?" Kate asked when she finished her meal.

"Oh, I have just the perfect idea." Rick smiled and put the dishes into the sink. "I'll wash these and then I'll show you."

"Let me do the dishes, you go find what ever it is that you have to find," she told him and pushed him away from the sink.

"Fine, but I still feel weird for letting you do the dishes," he told her and disappeared into his office.

Kate scrubbed the plates, thinking about the day. It had been wonderful, so far, and she really liked going out with Alexis. And even though she was 18 years older than her, she thought of her as a friend. She felt sorry for her. How could her mom not see how perfect she was? At least he had Rick as her dad. Like they said, nature always balances things out. Speaking of Rick, he was really starting to grow on her. He was more than a famous author.

Actually, Kate was surprised how normal he was. Just a normal guy, a single father and a good friend. She liked him, more than she would admit to herself.

Just then she heard Rick walking out of his office and turned around to see what he was carrying.

Two black vests and two pistols. He had to be kidding her.

"You have laser tags at home?" she asked, mouth hanging open.

"Well, Alexis loves them..." he said and looked at her. Kate gave him one of her 'don't lie to me' looks.

"You got me, I love them as much as she does," he admitted and handed one of the vests to her.

"Rules are simple, you get hit, you're dead. Game over," he said while strapping on his vest and waiting as Kate did the same.

"How long will we play?"

"Best out of ten. And Kate?" he said before she could turn around. "Be gentle, I don't have any training."

"Keep dreaming," she laughed and flicked the lights shut.

She had about 20 seconds before Rick would turn around and start looking for her. She needed a plan...

As it soon turned out, it was great way to pass time. She was ahead of him with only one point and they still had one point to go. She took a glance at the window that she was using as a mirror and saw Rick peeking out of his office. She took the shot and knew she'd hit her target as soon as she heard Rick swear.

"Not funny Kate," he told her, knowing she could hear him. "I'm coming to get you."

She turned around and took a few steps back, accidentally hitting the edge of a book self.

"Damn it," she whispered and rubbed her thigh.

Suddenly she heard a sound coming from behind her back and spun around just in time to see Rick standing there, finger on the trigger.

What he hadn't expected was her speed. Before he could react her gun was pointed at him.

For a moment they just stood there in silence and then Rick took a step closer.

"The last point," he told her, "Come one, you're a cop, I can't win that easily."

"No you can't," she told him just as she grabbed his gun out of his hand. But as Rick reached out and grabbed her by her shoulder, she didn't have enough time to get the point.

He pulled her to him but once it was done he didn't let go. Instead he pulled her even closer, his other hand still holding the gun. His hand was on her back and their faces were just inches apart.

Kate looked up at him thinking, _Is that what he wants? _Because right now all she wanted to do was to kiss him.

He was leaning closer and Kate heard as he dropped his gun, his hand coming to rest on her cheek. Kate's eyes momentarily dropped to his lips, knowing she'd feel them soon enough, then gazed into his blue eyes.

And then his lips were on hers, soft and warm, and she felt how she melted into him. The kiss was short, sweet and she liked it. But when he pulled away to look at her all she wanted was to have his lips on hers again. And apparently so did he.

His mouth was back on hers, more passionate this time and she heard as something hit the floor. Her gun, but she couldn't care less. She ran her fingers through his hair and he pulled her even closer to him.

Just then they both heard foot steps coming down the stairs and broke apart.

He was still looking at her, his arms around her small body and Kate was secretly happy that it was dim so he couldn't see how red her cheeks were.

"Daddy? Kate?" they heard Alexis' voice coming from the living room and Rick took a step back.

"We're in here," he yelled to her, not taking his eyes off Kate. Before Alexis could enter he took a step back.

"Hey, I was thinking that maybe we could make some pizza for dinner?" she said as she appeared in the doorway and both adults looked at her.

"Sure, we'll just put the laser tags away and then well join you," he told her and Alexis left.

He turned back at Kate.

"Um... We should probably go," he told her and she nodded. "And maybe we could talk after dinner? About this?" he asked, sounding uncertain, like he was afraid of her answer.

"Yeah," she agreed, "We really need to talk."

* * *

**So another chapter. I know it's been long and for that i'm really sorry. I want to thank everybody who followed this story or favorited it or took the time to leave a review:) it means a lot to me. Plus i really want to thank Miss Kitten, you should too, because she made this chapter readable, and i really mean readable:)**

**And i know it's kind of weird but happy new year:) Hope you all have a wonderful one!**

**As always i'd like to hear your thoughts? review?**

**xo Eva**


End file.
